Skip to main content

Few words before I leave

I am done all packing, the furniture are all wrapped with newspaper, the clothes in beddings, the kitchen utensils in cartoons, Electronic gadgets in their cases, I am all geared up to move this Sunday. But I have always felt that it is not justifiable enough to leave before having to leave few words to the place I have lived many years. I do not know what the weather be like, rain has already come, if I am lucky the sun shine may accompany me, but I do not alter the planned expedition. I should have been gone long time back and I am going anyway.

"But time has now come to leave behind and walk to the strange land in the east"

If I have been in Chhukha for so long, it is because the place gave me the reason to live. The place had it embedded in all its corners the episodes of the life I have lived be it happy or otherwise. The building we lived together, the roads we drove and walked, the market we visited, the offices we attended each has a tale galore to tell. Although she failed me early at the start of our life, she was there always with me spiritually. The features of the place helped me remember and keep her always with me. But time has now come to leave behind and walk to the strange land in the east. My going to the east will separate me with her and important of all, our son, which is her last matrimonial gift to me.

I am going but for sure I am taking the memories with me, which I have promised myself to keep for eternity. The memories of our happy life together as a young couple, the memories of how happily we lived with our son, how much she struggled to cling to dear life, memories of how she fell despite all efforts. She has to forgive me since I could not stay intoxicated by the gruesome past and had to let the show go on. Though almost everything crashed with her, the ember in the last coal of my life remained glowing. It is this ember which sparked off and burned up to the fire that warms up my life now. But I have always dedicated one corner of my heart to her.

"We lived life of dreams and fancies glimmering in our eyes not knowing of an abrupt end"

Going back three years, it was our mutual and genuine love for each other that led us all the way to sharing the destiny together. We lived life of dreams and fancies glimmering in our eyes. But little did we know that it is going to encounter an abrupt end. She struck an irreparable disease and succumbed to it when her husband and five months old son was just beginning to love her all the more. Then she vanished into thin air leaving behind two of us to live in faint memory. But we survived no matter the consequences.

"I promise to take her with me everywhere I go, though not physically but etched in my memory"

So, no matter how far I am going, she has always lived in my heart. I can never let it get deleted. I promise to take her with me everywhere I go and literally complete my life with her only. To my son, forgive me if I have failed to shower you the love your late mother would have given you. I know it is my responsibility to make sure you are happy that you do not feel the loss after your mother is gone. Even if this is what I wanted, giving you everything you wanted, spiritually and materially, circumstances didn’t permit me. I am left with only option to make an endearing prayer and ask almighty to take care of you in all walks of life. I know he will understand me when he grows big enough to analyze the situation. For now I can only hope you are in the safest of the hand.

Before I say goodbye, I dedicate following prose to them right out of my heart;

To Late Mrs. Lotey Wangmo,
A lady with whom I spent 18 months of my married life together,
With the message, I have loved You,
Have been loving You,
And will Keep Loving you Only!
May your soul rest in peace in heavenly abode!

To My son Jigme Tshering, the Survivor,
Carrying half the name of his father,
Who was deprived of motherly love at tender age,
From his Loved Father Ugyen Tshering,
With the Message,
Grow with Might and Strength!

I live with the tainted and gruesome past,
Living my life buried in the Memories,
That the cruel destiny made!
Yet the life must Go on
Let only the Time Heal it!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My New Found Love: - What shall thy name be???

I count myself lucky having met her one sunny day near the place I presently stay. I purely attribute it to the destiny or the fate we shared since it was the invisible string of love and passion that brought us together. None would dare to agree to believe me that she just decided to stay with me midway in Chukha in her journey to Thimphu, having consulted neither her parents nor anyone who took her care. So bold she is, is she? If ever I have been waiting for the fresh love, it was she who would give me the correct doze. "Lucky girl she is!" We have now developed so much of attachment that we can hardly think of time away from each other. We love each other so much that we eat together in same plate, sleep in one bed, go for evening walk and literally do everything together. What love is this if it is not one genuine one? The time I have to be in office is the time I miss her most while she stay at home, sleeping all day till I return home. Lucky girl she is! She eats th...
Post a Comment
Read more

Cypress Surprise

It’s said that every cypress tree in Bhutan tells a tale. And indeed each one has a story. It just takes going around asking about the tree to unveil it. Besides being the national tree of Bhutan the cypress is associated with diverse myths and beliefs. Every grain of the cypress tree seen majestically towering over the dzongs, temples and stupas is imbued with intricate stories. Such stories are the greatest surprise surrounding the cypress. The two formidable trees at Baylangdra in Wangdue and at Kurjey in Bumthang are no exception to this. Their origin can be traced to the walking stick of the great Indian saint who visited Bhutan in 8th century. When such trees are planted, they’re done to serve as the ‘standing proof’ of the flourishing dharma. Often it is said that the trees will grow only if there is a prophecy that Buddhism will exist without waning. The trees cater to the locality as symbol of worship and blessings. The giant cypress tree growing near the Kurjey Lhakahng is ...
Post a Comment
Read more

What is the National Butterfly of Bhutan?

Ludlow's Bhutan Glory (Ludlowii bhutanitis) to be designated as the national Butterfly What is the National Butterfly of Bhutan? We do not have one yet. But we may have one soon. The rediscovered Ludlow’s Bhutan Swallowtail (Bhutanitis ludlowi) may become the national butterfly of Bhutan. "The research and the filming of this project will be carried out in partnership" The Memorandum of Understanding (MoU) signed this morning between Department of Forests and Park Services (DoFPS) under Ministry of Agriculture and Forests (MoAF) and Japanese researchers and film crew from NHK and The Butterfly Society of Japan will take up comprehensive research and filming on Bhutan’s Butterflies with special emphasis on Ludlow’s Bhutan Swallowtail. The research and the filming of this project will be carried out in partnership with Wildlife Conservation Division (WCD) and Ugyen Wangchuck Institute for Conservation and Environment (UWICE) as the national counterpart. “While w...
Post a Comment
Read more